Oh me, Oh my, I came across my blog today and thought " I haven't written anything since last year." It was a dramatic moment for my day (lol.) Well, I really haven't written anything on this blog since last year and truthfully I'm just not sure of what to say. My weight loss is still slowly progressing and I'm proud that for the year 2011 I lost a total of 35pds which meant that I met my new years resolution of last year...which was to lose30-40pds...and I did it :) Which is wonderful. Now my goal this year is to get to my goal weight which means that I still have about 110pds left to lose (so I think I can do this) but it will be difficult and I need to stay motivated.
Some big time motivations for me this year for this area...It sounds completely contradictory to lose all this weight and then want to gain 20-30pds of it back at the end of it but it's true...This time next year I want to have met my goal weight so I can focus on gaining some of the weight back: Any guesses as to why.? Yes, I do want to be pregnant again. I know it seems crazy but in all truthfulness I have only known what a high risk pregnancy feels like-when a pregnant women is obese it is considered to be high risk. What this meant was I started having regular checkups when I was between 6and8weeks pregnant and then it also meant for both two pregnancy's that I started weekly visits with my doctor when I reached 26weeks. That was a lot of doctors appointments...it was nuts. And it wasn't until after my 2nd was born that I realized it was because I was considered high risk because of my obesity. I would love to be pregnant and get to have normal checkups. I would also love to get maternity pictures done something I never wanted to do with my first 2 because I was already so huge I didn't think that I looked beautiful when I was pregnant just gigantic... I'm really not trying to be too hard on myself but it is how i felt and I missed on so much of the joys that pregnancy can be because I was too focused on what how my maternal obesity was affecting me and my babies. So that said 1 big motivator for me to meet my goal weight this year is so that I can focus on the fun task of getting and being pregnant next year...maybe just maybe.
Another huge motivation for me is a friend of mine is a really great photographer and she said that she would give me a free photo shoot if I met my goal weight. I just think it would be so awesome to have some fantastic "after" photos.
-On another note this weight loss journey has truly been good for my soul. I have become more focused on my relationship with Christ and less on what I look like. I have learned to enjoy and be grateful for the life that I have now and not for the one that I think I will have if "I could just lose all the weight." I also like to think that God has given me more peace of mind as well. I have a lot of peace in knowing that I am doing all that I can do to keep my body healthy. I only got sick 1 time this past year and that was a small head cold that lasted a whole 3days and I really do think that eating right and having regular exercise has helped keep me from catching other germs. My daughter also loves to exercise with me now and often when I go to put in a movie she will say "Mommy is it time for us to walk now" as I do a lot of walking videos while I'm at home. I enjoy sweating, I enjoy pushing myself to do things just to see if I can go the extra 10mins for a workout with a video. God has really changed my eating habits as well. I occasionally hunger for sweets and salts but not like I once did and instead of running to grab a piece of food that I think will fulfill me I will often stop and just pray for strength that God gives. I am so very thankful for all that God has taught me during 2011 and I am looking forward to the rest of 2012 and all that God holds for me this year!
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