Now, for a little while...

When I became a Christian a little over 11 years ago, I faced some difficult trials, hurtful, painful, and even scarring kind of trials. I didn't have much to hold on to, I wasn't yet fully active in a local church, and had few, serious, Christian friends. I often say that it was a time of "just God and I." Most of the theology that I came to deeply believe in wasn't taught to me by a Pastor but simply a Bible. I've often thought about why it seems that there could be so many different ideas coming out of just 1 passage. I thought very simplistically when it came to the Bible...I believed that what it said had to be true what more could there be to it than that? I claimed to know nothing then except that I was a sinner and that Christ was my savior, the only savior anyone could have.



I was definitely labeled a "Jesus Freak," and a "bible thumper" but I wasn't ashamed of that. I was so thankful for my salvation I couldn't imagine anything greater than giving praise to my savior and helping others know him as well. I wasn't afraid to tell people, sometimes complete strangers, that they were sinning, at the same time I wasn't afraid to show them love as well. I definitely spoke a lot of words but I also think that there was a lot of action as well. But I don't believe I was well liked or accepted by the majority, whether it was because they were jealous, or afraid, or simply annoyed I definitely suffered because i refused to follow the crowd. I'm not saying that I didn't make mistakes, trust me, there is plenty of people that could tell you all the mistakes i made. But I did learn from them, I did grow from them, and I changed because of them.



My family, well let's just say it took until after college for my dad to finally accept me as I was. The rest seemed some what indifferent towards me never quite fitting in with them but never really throwing me out of their presence.




Sometimes, I still cry remembering these trials. I longed for heaven, I longed to see my Savior, I longed to be where I belonged and I remember one troublesome, lonely night. I sat on my bed and cried for what seemed like hours and when I was done throwing myself at my Savior's feet I picked up my bible and read 1 Peter 1...I won't type it all but the verses that come to my mind specifically right now is 6-9



"...In this" (Peter is talking about salvation) "you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while, if need be, you have been grieved by various trials, that the genuineness of your faith, being much more precious than gold that perishes, though it is tested by fire, may be found to praise, honor, and glory at the revelation of Jesus Christ, whom having not seen you love. And though you do not see him now you believe, and are filled with an inexpressible joy,for you are receiving the goal of your faith , the salvation of your souls."



"...though now for a little while."



It's hard for me to imagine that this life we live here on earth really is only for "a little while." It does not last for an eternity, it is short, fleeting, merely a midst in the wind. And with that incredibly short life really does come incredibly short trials.

But they are not pointless trials,



"...that the genuineness of your faith...may be found to praise, honor, and glory..."



and they are valuable trials..



"being much more precious than gold that perishes, though it is tested by fire."



and they are trials that show us how remarkable faith really is not because of us but because of Christ



"...and though you have not seen him, you love him. And even though you do not see him now you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy."



and they are trials that will show us..."the end of our faith, the salvation of our souls."



Yes, only for a little while longer will I need to persevere.