One would think that with a work history and resume like Carl's he would be able to find even a simple job but with the economy the way that it is...he's not able to.
I'm not really worried about it and i think that frustrates Carl some. But i trust God and I've seen him work what seems like miracles ( to me) to know that even when He makes us wait he can be trusted. I believe that God is teaching Carl somethings about himself, such as it's not Carl who is the primary provider for our family but ultimately it is God...
However it's still not easy as many of you know...especially for a man to have stepped out in so much faith to do what he believes that God has led him to do and then to feel like God has forgotten him.
But walking in Faith is never easy...I think it can seem like it gets easier the more we do it but in reality it's not that it's gotten more easier, but we learn to see God during the walk and that leaves us more hopeful.
So, I just ask for prayer...Prayer that God will show himself faithful to my husband and encourage me by doing so. Prayer that Carl will turn to HIM and in the midst of Carl's inner pain that i will be able to encourage him and comfort him in the same way that I have been comforted. And Prayer that we will draw closer to the one that Loves us and that has brought us on this journey.
Pray for me...because all though i don't "really worry" everyday, there are days that I do. I wake up anxious at 2:00am wondering how we will be able to get the other things we still need for the baby as no one we know really has a lot of money to give to us for major items such as a breast pump and cloth diapers maybe even a stroller. And yes i know that I won't need a pump right away...i still wonder about it. And all though cloth diapers arent' the most ideal way to handle poopy diapers...we will save money in the long run even though the initial cost can be substantial. And we aren't running into any yard sales this time of the year...but maybe the Salvation Army or Good will might have a thing or two for us...
Just a random note... I once worked for a nursing home that did not use disposable diapers...they used cloth like cotton pads...and we had to rinse them off in a big tub and everything...so i think i'm prepared for a little pad? Maybe?
I also wake up worrying about my husband. I worry if he's really okay, if God will cheer him up and encourage him soon. I wonder what he must feel like...because all though he opens up to me it's hard for a man to place into words feelings of inadequacy, and failure. And lastly i know i shouldn't but I do...sometimes i wonder will God really show himself faithful to him. I worry about God's image...strange, i know, but true.
But try not to worry for us please we aren't starving and we aren't even close to be evicted from our house. We are not without electricity or water or even medical insurance yet for that matter. Thankfully the Lord gave Carl a lot of wisdom in saving money up but like other people I know Carl hates dipping into the saving's account he likes to have his little security bucket...
Just pray...Please just pray for Him, pray for me that i'll know how to be a good wife. Just pray
Thanks
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