I had a long talk with God last night and I cried hard so hard mostly because of some things in my life that i can't publicly blog about but those things have left me not wanting to be here for the next year. I pleaded with God last night to not make me stay here because my 'little' heart just can't take another heartache. I cried long and hard, and in the end ultimately submitted myself before HIM. That 1092 that's going to go to BBC was suppossed to help me go to Arkansas...Well, i did tell God he would have to do something big, i guess he did.
Then I fell down the stairs pretty hard, and that made me cry even more. I've got a nice bruise right on the small of my back and the muscle that links your butt and thigh together hurts like crazy, it's hard to move, and its hard to want to do anything else.
This afternoon we're suppossed to be playing paintball and I don't want to. I really don't. I'm just in a not so good mood that just doesnt' know what to do with itself. It's not as crabby as it could be, i have more self control not to let it make other people miserable, but i try to lift up the mood and i can't seem to do that either...lol
Well, its saturday and we're still working here at camp, maybe i should get back to work.
1 comment:
HOney..please belive me..the school will wait to be paid. There is nothing saying that it has to be paid now, or in the next 5 months. Schools are used to being last on the list of payees.
Forget about it for now. REALLY. Truely forget about it. Its not your problem its God's. ISn't He the one that has to meet your needs as an Earthly Father meets our needs here..or is supposed to?
Just Plan on getting to arkansas. We'll get you there somehow.
D.
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