It has been a mentally stressing week for me so far. And today it really didn't get any less stressing. Last night I prayed for a couple of things, 1. That God would help me to see his blessings and to know and believe that he is good. 2. That i would work on being me and not somebody else. 3.That God would help me to trust that he will provide for me.
I will explain the 3rd one, I've finally done 'it'. I've finally set a budget for myself so that i could take care of a few bills before i graduate, and i was feeling pretty confident about it...but for some reason last night i prayed that 3rd prayer even though i knew that my budget was set and the income i recieve every week is fixed...
Now, last night i was late for work and so this morning i apologized for being late, and Maurine said "Well, i was afraid that you weren't coming because you sensed that i had bad news for you." At this moment in time i'm thinking i'm about to lose my job a month before school is out...but instead to my relief and yet discomfort she said "My family has been giving me a hard time and they think that i'm paying you too much so i'm going to have to only give you less."
So, without telling everyone how much i was making i will tell you what the paycut means for me..it means 54.00 less a week than what i was getting, and that is a significant difference. I am thankful for a couple of things like at least this is happening now instead of at the beginning of the year and what not..54.00 is a significant amount that i will now have to take out of my budget every week. This mostly just means re-balancing my budget out and starting a new.
It just isn't fun, and i have taxes that i still haven't payed yet.
I just find it a little ironic that the night after i pray for help in trusting in provision i get a pay cut...lol, don't most people get a pay raise after a conversation like that, lol..lol...lol.!!!
Wow! God must know that i really trust him or maybe he knows that my trust level is down and that is why he is doing it...who knows. I'm not God...but sometimes i wish i was...
2 comments:
i've experienced a lot of this kind of thing in the last year, sara. and what i have learned...is that no matter how bad it looks (my roommate moves out, my car breaks down, i get taken off salary, etc)...God will take care of me. i've never gone without food long enough to hurt me, i've never been without transportation of some sort, i've never been stuck in the cold or the rain without a roof over my head. you'll be okay. put that faith into action and act on it (in other words...you know God will take care of you, so why not thank Him for it and just act like you're already past those things). i know...easier said than done. i myself am in quite a financial predicament right now...but i refuse to be "cast down" by it. i am not gonna fester over something that has already been worked out in God's plan. (now i'll probably have to eat my words).
I just want you to know that I love you and am praying for you...I think you will be suprised as you look back and see what God does...he usually has some pretty good suprises up his sleeve!
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