Learning to be disciplined

"No discipline, at the moment, seems pleasant but painful. However it produces a harvest of righteousness and of peace for those that have been trained by it." -Hebrews 12:11

This is a verse that I had to remind myself over the last week while I have been continuing my weight loss journey. I know that the author of the book of Hebrews was talking about more grander things than just weight loss discipline but I believe that this verse can apply to all areas of our lives. Funny how scripture can do that?

Learning to control my body instead of it controlling me has been difficult for me. I have not been able to go through this process sin free. I've been grumpy, angry, upset, call it what you want all because i rebelliously refuse to indulge my cravings. I'm hoping that this will become easier as I adjust to a new lifestyle.

I don't refuse myself of everything, but it's really tempting to eat 2-3servings instead of just one. My stomach has been stretched to be able to fit a lot in it and now that I'm now longer filling the whole thing up my body tells me that it wants more...but wanting and needing something are two completely different things. "No discipline, at the moment, seems pleasant but painful..."

There have also been moments when I have sinfully cried over the fact that I wanted something to eat. Times where I have been bored and have felt a heavy sadness come over me because I was not turning to food in order to have something to do. Instead, i searched for other good things to satisfy that desire.

I have come to realize how much I have worshiped food. I mean if I wasn't worshiping it would I really be crying over it? Not exactly sure where the line between feeling hormonal and actually worshiping something is.

I am praying that I will make it through this first month of developing a new lifestyle. I've never gone a whole month before on any kind of lifestyle change plan. I'm committed to get through this first month of discipline, I figure if I can make it through one month i should be able to make it through another, and then another, and hopefully before I even know it I will have made it through a whole year.

I will be out of what I've started as a "normal routine" next week and I'm hoping that I will find a way to stay on track with this journey. I know that there will be a lot of temptation next week and I am praying that I can still stick to my set calories everyday. All though I will admit next week i have a birthday in there and on my birthday I will give myself a little more liberty. But I still do not, even then, want to be gluttonous or be worshiping food.

So it will be about 10days before you will hear from me again. Please pray for my journey sometime during the next 10days if you think about it.