a little bit of reflection as always.

I've been thinking about all the changes that can take place in just 1 year. As most of you know i do this often and I do it often for many reasons but maybe the main reason is because it all helps point me back to the bigger picture of life ( this is kind of a random post but trust me it all really does tie together...at least in my mind.)

I do not consider myself 'spiritual' on a lot of levels...I don't read my bible as nearly often as i should and there are times when i could careless about going to church (ahhh the truth of my gentile background comes out) and, as great as i am about praying, I even slack in that area from time to time.... So there are moments throughout my journey with Christ when i start loosing my perspective and begin to dive deep into my selfish ways...but this is where the art of 'reflection' comes into play.

Evey once in a while I like to give myself a gentle "Reality Check" and the kind of reality check that i get isn't one where i look at all my bills and realize that i have no money...etc. In fact it isn't the typical reality check at all....but it is one where the bigger picture comes back into the game after a period out on the side lines.

I think that so many people, so many Christians look at just there circumstances, and i am very guilty of this myself, and all we are capable of seeing and placing together is how we've sacrificed and given up soooooooo much....for what?

We look at the lack of money and overlook all the love that we have been given. We look at the lack of materials and overlook all the relationships that have been formed. We look at the American dream and realize how little of it we've really achieved and as a result we overlook all the grace, mercy, and redemption that has been laid at our feet.

I don't know about you but i know that i am proaned to the cycles of living in my circumstances instead of living in the truth....and there's another thing....i think sometimes we exchange the truth for the lies...

Yeah, sometimes life just sucks, and we all have had those moments where life has sucked, when we've had too many things thrown at us all at once and we're left wondering when is it our turn to be okay....As the Ariel in the Little Mermaid sings "When's it MY TURN,..."

I have had plenty of those moments in my Christian walk...

So when i want to change my attitude, when i want to be a little more grateful for the things that God has given me, when i want to stop complaining and telling God how aweful he must be for building my character, for teaching me something about suffering and what people all over the world go through on a regular bases, when i want to shut up and start realizing how all the circumstances of life can actually draw me closer to the man that saved me from my sin.... I sit down and I reflect.

I remember where i was before i got saved, i remember the loneliness, the despair, the hopelessness, the loveless life that i lead. I remember how all the hurts after salvation deepened my walk with Christ. I remember how the small faith that i had in moments of peril was just the right amount to get me through. I remember the blessings, the gifts that came at just the right time, and I remember the People....THE PEOPLE that he used to help me through those times.

Amy once told me that we go through seasons of our life, and sometimes "God brings certain people in our lives for only a season"...and nothing more. It is sad to watch them leave but we will see them again, the other thing is just because they've been apart of a season of our lives doesn't mean that they have to or that they get to be apart of all the seasons of our lives.

They were used with and for a purpose...so we should praise God for what he did through them and with them while they were here...

Saying goodbye to people has always been a very hard thing for me to do...but I reflect and I remember that His ways are best and they are good even if we don't see it...i remind myself of the truth...even if the lies are easier to believe.

WE all have to keep fighting the good fight...


So all of that to say....these have been my thoughts as of late....